### Rock Golems

Rock Golems are dumb. Really dumb. They have brains, they can speak, but for some reason the brain only ever gets used when there's something that raw instinct can't deal with, and that's rare. The speaking is disjointed, like someone... well... really, really dumb. One of the big contributors to this is that rock golems don't really need to think - they're essentially a bunch of rocks that can theoretically think, whether it's by some freak of evolution, some sort of magic that doesn't dare reveal itself to the world in case it might ever do something constructive, or by the hidden hand of some higher power. Rock golems don't need to eat, being rock, but they do take great pleasure in crushing things with their large, heavy fists, and so will try to crush things as often as possible. They tend to get confused about moving around obstacles, however, and usually just wait for out of the way targets to move to a more accessible spot. They know enough, though, not to squish their own kind, which causes great confusion when something tries such subtle subterfuge as being vaguely rock-shaped, and it is maintained that it is impossible to describe rock golems without feeling an incredible sense of superiority over them when talking about their intellect. They're just that dumb.

Monster Reference
Contents